Nintendo has a lot of things in their games that just don't make any sense. Not just eating shrooms to get "big", oh no. There are worse things in their games that many people simply ignore, like mass animal slaughtering, spontaneously combusting bosses, and characters created simply to mock the impaired. SlapStic takes a closer look.

10. Animal Slaughter on a Grand Scale is Okay

So you’re standing there minding your own business and a turtle comes waddling up to you. If you’re a sane human being, you just watch it go by on its merry little way or pick it up and try to feed it dirt or something. If you’re a Nintendo character, however, you stomp on that little terrorist’s head and then kick his dead, lifeless corpse at his friends and kill them too! It doesn’t end there. Innocent alligators in Donkey Kong get hit with barrels until they die of blunt force trauma (all because they’re between DK and his bananas). If you come upon a bear cub in Poke’mon, you better dragon-kick that sucker in the melon until he passes out or you won’t be able to fit him in your little apple-sized container. Samus is the sole reason that some species of bats are extinct. The animal crossing guy puts live fish in his pants and laughs as they die of suffocation! The list goes on and on, getting only worse. The atrocities committed in the average Nintendo release would make a PETA member's head explode. Disgusting.

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RKRigney via slapstic.com »