Final Fantasy VII has given us alot of things: A great RPG plot, a bunch of memorable characters, and a largely pointless copilation. But it also taught us some misguided life-lessons. Worrying lessons that Squaresoft possibly never intended to teach us...

When you’re only 10-years-old and playing Final Fantasy VII for the first time, there’s only so much you can take in. Even after subsequent playthroughs, it’s impossible to register all the game’s subtitles because the A.D.D-rattled brain of a child has barely developed beyond realizing that sticking metal objects in electric outlets usually yields a bad outcome.

Fast forward twelve years or so and you’re playing Final Fantasy VII again through the PlayStation Network. Except now you begin to notice things that you didn’t before. Important things like plot, character development, overarching themes and how absurdly enormous Tifa’s boobs are.

There’s also a plethora of life lessons that can be derived from analyzing Final Fantasy VII. Granted, Square-Enix would probably refuse to endorse any of these valuable (if somewhat misguided) lessons...and yet, they’re there just waiting to be applied in the most inappropriate ways.

Miss Razz via collegenews.com »